A Crush Cure-all

When you have a cold home remedies do wonders, if only because they make you feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. Crush’s Novemberrrrrr Cure for the Cold and Common Cold will make you feel all warm and fuzzy on the outside…
Combine parts:
30% Cashmere
70% Wool
One gold chain
2 patch pockets

Stir until you’ve reached desired consistency.
Walk home.
Remove from Crush bag.
Wrap sweater around you.

In a separate cup:
Add one tea bag to hot [not boiling] water
Add three drops of honey, and enjoy! [optional]